


Summer Flower

by Saniika



Series: Yuki-onna AU [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Anal Sex, Japanese Mythology & Folklore, M/M, Mention of blood, Other, Rape/Non-con Elements, Youkai, Yuki-Onna - Freeform, handjob, murder - mention - not explicit, underage victor - attempted rape - not explicit, yuki-onna au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-13
Updated: 2017-09-01
Packaged: 2018-12-15 01:29:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11795613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saniika/pseuds/Saniika
Summary: Yuki-onna twists the oath and Yuuri is left with a child to take care of and no husband to call his own. Everyone wishes him to be married, but he's dead set to become a devoted father.Yet it won't be so easy as he thought. Or will it?





	1. Limits exist within time

**Author's Note:**

  * For [eof](https://archiveofourown.org/users/eof/gifts).



> This has no beta. I apologize for any mistakes. So, there is a sequel after all.  
> Thank you so much for the feedback on the first part, I haven't expected that at all and simply hoped someone will enjoy what I loved to write.
> 
> Hopefully you'll like this one as well.
> 
> Enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !warning - the dogie doesn't die, but is badly hurt - there is a brief mention of his injury, nothing in detail or graphic!
> 
> This is a Sequel to Frozen. I advise to read the first part before reading this.

The present Hasetsu is graced by kinder changes of seasons. Spring doesn’t rush, it appears gently, slipping into summer and light winds blow in the autumn. Winter changes as well. The blizzards pass the town’s verge. As a result the streets are sprinkled with loose snow just like powdered sugar. The children can’t form any statue from it or use it to play snowball fights. It’s a mild winter, hardly one the older people remember from four years ago. Perhaps it was a blessing or a good deed done which appeased the spirits, which freed the town of harsh weather. Speculations circulate, it might have something to do with the Katsukis. The family is prospering, the business flourishes and no ill luck seems to cross their way. Except for one.

Yuuri Katsuki, the aspiring dancer in his youth, abandoned his career due to unfortunate accident and ever since his poor mangled leg troubles his health. The town people are impressed he could last so long, the fever being so frequent traveling all over his body. For five years he miraculously survived, no doctors visiting their household - he scraped along thanks to herbal remedies and a good fortune. Yet it seemed it run out on him, because five year after the accident his leg turned almost black and a decision had to be made. Yuuri’s leg had to come off.

Perhaps it’s still fortune in disguise because Yuuri’s leg healed well after the amputation. Maybe it was thanks to the foundling. Yutopia is filled with laughter. A small child fills the days of its residents with light brighter than the sun. No one asks where it came from. The tiny baby was accepted by the family with the same commonplace as Hiroko took the basket from the doorstep and as Yuuri cradled it in his shaking arms crying his soul out.

The bad tongues are often on a rampage. Yuuri is deaf to them when he walks in the streets on rare occasions. He’s a wondrous sight to behold. At twenty nine, he’s aging well - his hair is still raven black and he keeps his figure despite the impaired movement. Because Yuuri developed a skill during the time he was bedridden - crafting and painting fans - he is in the center of attention against his wishes. Therefore it’s not a surprise for him when he's ogled upon as he goes out to fetch supplies like wood or paints.

Those are also the times the neighbors catch a glimpse of the child - Victor - who stays inside otherwise, avoiding other children. You couldn’t see a more contradicting couple walking in the streets. Looks are the first that strike you as difference between them, but it’s more than that. Where Yuuri is soft spoken, Victor is silver-tongued. The small one chattering with everyone and anything. The young man takes such good care of him as a father that no other man ever could. It's an endearing display.The sightings of Yuuri’s demeanor outside the Yutopia is enough for women and men to blush dreamily and many mother’s wish, their offspring could marry into the Katsuki family. Not even the wooden prosthetic leg puts the interested suitors away. The prospect of wealth, security and good character is very appealing.

Yuuri is not ecstatic about it. Yes, his fans are masterpieces, but too often comes the customer - either a mother or a father - to order one under the pretence to offer their daughter or a son as a suitable partner. They were just happen to wonder, if Yuuri doesn't look for someone to share his joy with... It’s always the same answer they get to hear.

“I appreciate your kind offer, I am very humbled by your consideration. Yet I am a taken man, fully set on taking care of my son. I wouldn’t give the proper attention to your groom he would deserve.”

The way he says it is very light, gentle voice ringing in the craft room like jingle bells. It's similar in character like enjoying a company of a courtesan in a public parlour. The smiles doesn't reach his eyes and his face is so closed off, that any argument of the customer is stuck in their throat. In fact, each time they leave Yutopia, they complain of sore throat and are in dire need of scalding tea. He is happy to oblige, leading the guests out with a prepared herbal blend in a carefully sealed paper bag. On the house. The child in question is clinging to his side during the whole time peeking from underneath his short fringe. Hard to tell what is more mesmerising, the determined father or the boy with the brilliant blue eyes.

They can only look longingly on his back as he leaves, glancing to make sure if he won't consider. He walks away without a single shred of interest, holding the small hand of the boy and speaks to him kindly.

“Vic-chan, are you tired? No? Do you think you’d like to help me with the drying of herbs? Hiroko mama will make us a nice lunch in the meantime.”

“Yes! I’ll help! Lunch!” His son laughs and pumps his tiny fist into the air and hops around imitating a bunny, the newest favourite past time.

“Yuuri, you know, it might not be such a bad idea after all. Wouldn’t you like a wife or a husband? Maybe Vic-chan would like a second parent? Sometimes you look quite lonely...” Mari asks him once after dinner on the terrace. She's dragging on her pipe, blowing the smoke to the side. Yuuri sits in a rocking chair with his son. Victor is sleeping on his lap and Yuuri is petting his fine hair, tucking the loose strands behind his ear. Something seems to trouble him, because he frowns in his sleep and he moans a little tormented like when his stomach is aching.

Yuuri picks him up, tucking the tiny head under his chin and gets ready to leave for their room. He passes Mari with a simple acknowledgement. “I know.” He doesn't know what to tell her more, because she is right. But he can't explain her why he feels lonely. He can't tell anyone he is still mourning.

She doesn’t ask anymore, no one does. When it comes down to it, their family is big enough to substitute for all kind’s of love for Yuuri and his son. Small Victor finds support in all family members. He clings to Yuuri like a tick, wrapping around his healthy leg, tugging on his sleeve or holding onto his fingers, whenever Yuuri moves around the house or takes him out for an errand. Toshiya makes fun of him on several occasions, for example when Yuuri wants to use the lavatory and Victor doesn’t want to detach from him.

“Vic-chan, let go of Yuuri. Come and play with me and Vic-chan for a while. Are you afraid someone might take him away?”

“No, mine!” He pouts and attached himself even more firmly to his parent. Mari and Hiroko have to trick him sometimes with candy, just so Yuuri can gave a moment of privacy.

After four years Yuuri simply gives up and stops making the fans just to avoid the inevitable conversations with marriage hungry customers. He dedicates his sole attention to Vic-chan and teaches him about herbal medicines. He is not as skilled as his late husband, but he remembers a few things. Then there are books he can look into and develop the basic knowledge he has. He even picks up a letter exchange with the doctor from across the mountain.

It starts because small Victor has restless dreams and some nights Yuuri finds him sleepwalking. Two times it happens, Yuuri wakes up and sees Victor crouching next to his head and his small palm is caressing Yuuri's cheek carefully. His soft fingertips trace Yuuri's cheekbone like kisses by butterfly wings. Strange glint is present in his large eyes which seem to see something more than Yuuri. As if there was some beautiful memory playing inside his mind's eye. A soft child's voice whispers sweet nothings, you'd murmur to a lover in the afterglow. Something that can’t be understood by someone so young.

Yuuri needs a day or two to calm down after each of these happenings. The storm passes with great effort, yet he cannot confide in anyone, because no one remembers his husband nor the fact Yuuri was married. This makes the pain harder to bear. The closure doesn't come and he keeps the conflicted feeling festering inside, eating at him slowly. Yuuri thinks sometimes the life with his husband was only a dream after all. Maybe it was just an elaborate, intricate but impossible feverish dream. Maybe it’s better to forget it all. The pain might disappear, if he won't pay attention to it. There is a lot of happiness with the small son on his side to concentrate on. Laughter does heal, bit by bit. Puts his heart together piece by piece.

When they celebrate Victor’s fourth birthday, the joy doesn’t last too long. Hiroko just finishes making mochi bunnies and is wiping Victor's chubby cheeks from the flour when Mari brings in Vic-chan - the small poodle. He run off under the hooves of a horse on the street. His ribs are broken. Hiroko quickly rushes to take Victor away, so that he doesn’t see the suffering dog. However the painful whines can’t escape the curious child's hearing. He immediately ask, insisting on answer and brushes of the blatant effort of adults around to play down the issue. He is a bright child, too smart for his own age. The guests watch on with pity as the small child cries in despair despite confusion - unable to grasp what is happening. Until his father returns from an errand no one can appease him. He hides his red face in Hiroko's lap and Toshiya caresses his small back in reassuring manner. Normally he'd fall asleep right away. But the moment the door slides open and Yuuri's geta clack in the entrance, little Victor flies to him like an arrow.

“Papa! Papa! Vic-chan! Vic-chan!” He stretched out his hands towards Yuuri the moment the other enters the common room. Yuuri pulls him close immediately as he jumps to his arms, the safe harbor. He takes the news from his mother, understanding right way, when she shakes her head. The damage is too great, the small canine probably won’t survive the night.

It takes a while until Yuuri calms Victor down, cradling him in his arms on the futon tucked under the cover. His round face is wet from tears, small salty rivulets drawing on his cheeks and he sobs every now and then. The hiccups break the quiet of the room. It’s hard to explain to a child that the loved animal is not going to be part of his life anymore. Even harder to explain there is nothing anyone can do for the doggie. Yuuri tells him he wishes he could make Vic-chan better again, but he can't. It’s a taxing night.

Yuuri startles from his sleep, shocked that he dozed off. Instinctively his hands roam for Victor’s small body in the dark to caress his back and check if he’s sleeping alright. Yet his hands don’t find it, just the empty sheets and gaping space under the cover. He can't hear his breathing. Quick check around the room with straining eyes convinces him, that his son is nowhere in sight. He scrambles to get his leg that lays aside the futon prepared for the emergency. He’s halfway done with putting it on, the leather belts sliding into the metal clasps with ease. But when the shoji door quietly slides it seems to almost drown out the sound.

Clouds decide momentarily to move away from the moon and it slips inside the sleeping room, lighting everything in it bright with a shine. Victor is standing on the threshold, Vic-chan resting in his arms and no whines are heard from the small pet. 

Light but older voice whispers reassuringly, while the familiar unseeing eyes stare at nothing into the thin air. “It’s ok, Vic-chan, you are fine now. It won't hurt anymore.”

Yuuri doesn't have the time to take the sight in, because the boy slides down on the tatami floor, accompanied by a soft thud like flower petal twirling down from a tree. Yuuri rushes to his side to check his condition. He is paler than usual... taller and older as well. Vic-chan crawls from his protective hold and licks his face. The dog moves as if nothing ever happened to him, younger even.

Yuuri swallows, the familiar taste of doubt rolls over his tongue, leaving bitter taste of anxiety after. With trembling hands he picks up limp Victor and brings him back to the futon. He covers his naked body with a sheet after making a fast scan of him. Nothing seems to be damaged, but… he is burning with fever.

Yuuri spends the whole night trying to put it down. Luckily it’s winter and he can use the snow from the backyard. The whole ryokan is asleep and no one notices the lone father as he collects it in a bucket and brings it back to the room. He finds clothing shed and torn on the floor near Vic-chan's sleeping pillow in the corridor. He takes only a moment to rub them in disbelief in his hands, hides them in his cabinet and finds his older yukata he wore years ago as a young boy.

When the sun is rising and the first birds chirp to announce the new day, Victor’s fever is beaten and he lifts his heavy eyelids to gaze upon his caretaker. Something in his eyes makes Yuuri stop breathing and strain his hearing greatly. His ears itch in anticipation.

The boy smiles tiredly and exhales in peace: “Yuuri.” Such a familiar voice, almost like - his. But still spoken by a young boy. Yuuri’s heart trembles like a bird in a too small cage, its wings flapping in his lungs, making it hard to talk. He swallows and ask with a hoarse voice. Could he...? Perhaps he's...?

“Victor..?”

Yet no answer comes. Victor is dozing off again and Yuuri starts to think after a while if he just imagined it. The whole night seems so crazy in hindsight, it wouldn’t be too strange if Yuuri finally lost his mind. Victor - aged by six years over night - sleeps heavy, completely unconscious. His head is framed by shoulder-length hair spread on the pillow in a tangled silver mass. Few strands stick to his sweaty forehead, but his chest rises steadily and sinks after deep breaths. 

Yuuri reaches for a cloth with shaking hands and wipes his son’s face to make him feel more comfortable in his sleep. He thinks hard on how he'll explain this little change to his family. How will he make it work again, so he can function and be there for Victor - older, but still a child.

Turns out, he doesn’t have to explain anything in the end. No one finds it strange and acts like nothing ever happened. Just like the first time... Once again Yuuri pushes back at his pains and looks onto his son’s smiling face. They sit at a lunch surrounded by their whole family, excited Vic-chan running around barking for treats. Victor is making googly eyes on Hiroko and asking nicely for the mochi bunnies. Hiroko obliges and brings in a full plate, mentioning she can't seem to remember why she made them. Maybe it was a request of a guest who decided not to eat them? Well, better for them all - more for them to enjoy. Yuuri decides that the pain is not worth the time. With such happiness present, he should just convince himself it's all fine and that he’s not crazy. Not at all.


	2. Blooming in that sky, a summer flower

“Yuuri, have you…” The tall woman places her sake cup down on the table so that Yuuri can pour her another round. She doesn't continue, so her drinking partner is ready to supply her commentary. “...thought on training Vic-chan professionally?” 

“So?” She combs her hair away from her face with fingers, the blush on her cheeks making her look more eager. “He’s amazing with fan-work and wears kimono’s magnificently! Once he’s older he'll... he’s a natural talent! With the right guidance he’ll…”, she trails off again, now twirling her fingers in the air as if to write the rest of the sentence.

“...make it to the Emperor's stage. I know. I’d do anything to support him and make him flourish.” He finished her sentence again, playing with the cup and the small sake bottle the best he can while avoiding to look into her eyes. She seems to be relentless regardless.

“He’s the perfect age to start with. No better timing than now will come again.” She downs her cup and pours one to Yuuri with great care, trying to lure him into the conversation. He starts wearily: “Minako, I haven’t danced for nine years. And it’s not exactly like I can show him all the moves.” He knocks on his artificial leg as if to prove the point. 

Clack.

The dull sound echoes through the room. It initiates an atmosphere you’d experience in a tearoom upon entering it. It’s almost as if the small bar turned into a meditation center. 

“So what’s the issue then?” She adds patiently, drumming her fingers on her cheekbone. 

Yuuri rests his forehead on the table and rubs his face on it in frustration. They are alone with no one listening to their private conversation. Yuuri is on a rare outing from the Yutopia and Vic-chan is gone on a trip with the Katsuki parents. Toshiya was egging Victor on for a whole month, telling him all kinds of stories about the temple on the mountain. It is Victor’s first pilgrimage and Yuuri couldn’t join them due to his leg. He’d only slow them down. They agreed it would be better to go without him, so they could return home sooner. Victor was so excited to go too. 

“You know, Vic-chan was so eager. He didn’t miss an evening to ask me about all the spirits and wondrous things he’ll see on the travel through the woods. But yesterday, when they were about to leave... He purposely forgot something several times back in our sleeping room. I had to shove him out of the house and send him off. Mom and dad practically dragged him away. He was looking back all the time until they reached the end of the road.” He raises his head and peeks on his former teacher with an intent.

Clack.

She fluffs his messed up fringe and raises his chin, grumbling a little. “Yuuri, of course he didn’t want to leave. He’s ten - still a kid - and he never left the town!... But this isn’t about him being gone for a few days, is it? Spill it.” 

He exhales deeply and rests his jaw on her palm. His cheek puffs out as if he were a little kid that she once trained herself. “No.”

“I’ll help. We’ll train him together. You are still fluid with your movements, you know. It’s not something that leaves your body when you stop to dance. I’ll step in with demonstration where you can’t. He’ll learn from the best. What are you so afraid of?” She asks petting him gently and waits as he sorts out his thoughts.

“What if he’ll make it to the audition and passes the exam? What if he’ll be actually taken to dance at the court? ...I’m not sure if I’m ready to let him go.” He frowns and Minako cuts in a little firmer, patting him on his cheek once, ready to give him a pep talk.

“Yuuri, it’ll take at least six years until he’s fully trained in the art of the dance. You took longer because you needed to build your mental confidence. He’s naturally confident and gifted, but his body needs to mature. Until then… You’ll have more time to adjust to the notion that kids grow up and leave the household. Just like your parents, you should give him the chance to build his livelihood. Give him that option, just like your parents gave you yours?”

Clack.

Yuuri feels his intrusive thoughts hoping around like a deer and Minako’s voice is chasing them away just like the shishi odoshi - the deer chaser. He dares once again and approaches the issue that’s proving to fuel his thirst for alcohol tonight. He is in the need of cleansing. The truth is, he is not selfish - he’d let Victor go. But it's the fear… 

“Minako, you know what happens at the court... It’s not just the dancing that’s at the center stage. You warned me years ago and again with emphasis on the day I went for the audition.” The drunken haze is gone from his mind, his thoughts jump from the bushes on a wide meadow in the space between them. They are bright as a day, clear like the purest water.

She drops her hand, abandoning her warm motherly caress. Her eyes narrow, the dark gray storm brewing in them. She speaks up in a challenge. “And did it stop you?”

“No.” Yuuri almost barks out sitting upright now. He looks to the ground adding: “The carriage did.”

And just like that, the deer-thoughts are scared away. Only his old regrets making him drop his shoulders and he can feel the alcohol flowing into his veins, driving out the tension like some sort of demon. 

“Yuuri… who knows, maybe he’ll figure out he doesn’t want to do it after all. Let’s worry about that once the issue sets in, ok?” She pulls him to her side and presses his head on her shoulder. Minako is indeed kind, she knows when to pull out her claws and when to purr like the softest cat. A true master with a whip and honey. Yuuri hums in approval and leans heavy into her form, momentarily forgetting his usual reserve. It’s good to rest, sometimes.

“Minako, if you only knew. He was just a small baby a while ago! Little boy, right in my arms. He… He grew up so fast!” Yuuri chokes out astounded, slurring his words as he does. She plays with his locks and whispers soothingly. “Yes, yes. Very small. A baby.”

Minako doesn’t mind at all, doesn’t give it any second thoughts as he spills his deepest secrets about Victor magically growing up. Perhaps it's the combination of his garbled speech and her own drive to drink away the sadness. Each of them is trying to deal with their own demons tonight behind the drinking table. Yuuri - his knowledge of things that no one remembers. What an irony, that Yuuri can confide without the danger of being ridiculed or shunned as a madman. Whereas Minako mourns once again the wasted gift of Yuuri’s and drinks to celebrate that it comes in disguise for Victor. The growing boy can cherish it in his place.

In the end, after the evening passes and both of them are sobered up, a real talk happens between them. Yuuri agrees and they settle on a plan. Yuuri takes notes from Minako and carries some items back home, where he prepares them. He adds few of his own, the fans he used for training from his own student years. As he’s picking them he’s tracing his fingers over their surface, folds away the paper and fabric in the cabinets. He looks for the small practice kimono with the long sleeves. He’s imagining how Victor moves around with them flapping behind his figure. He can almost see it. He has to admit with a small blush warming up his cheeks, he’d like to see it and wonders how the sight will be like.

When they return from the trip, Victor flies straight to him and wraps his arms around Yuuri’s waist. He’s taller now, gone are the times when he was clinging to Yuuri’s leg, hiding in front of the guests. He immediately tells tales about how everything was fantastic and that mentions, he definitely had seen a youkai peeking from behind the trees on the way to the temple. Mari serves them all tea and Victor latches onto Yuuri once again, sitting in his lap, clinging to his yukata. Seems the whole experience opened a gate to a whole flood of questions instead of answering the one’s the boy might have had before.

Yuuri promises to paint him an illustration of the stone fox. Victor really likes them, excited about the prospect that they come to life when the temple needs protection. 

“Do they laugh if you tell them a joke? Maybe that’s why they snicker all the time as stone statues? Papa, what if they roll on the ground in laughter once no one sees them?”

Yuuri manages to nod mostly, having no real chance to answer, because Victor goes on and on - his excitement growing any minute. By the time they are done, the evening rolls in and Yuuri takes Victor to their room. When changed to their sleeping attire, they sit on the futon and Yuuri combs his son’s shoulder length hair. 

The boy is quiet as usual, but his shoulders sag and Yuuri knows something is on his mind. He let’s the teeth of the comb sink in the pale strands and takes his time working through the tangles. Yuuri is a patient parent and gives Victor space to think through his wild thoughts. The wait isn’t too long.

“Toshiya-papa told me about a story when we slept in the temple. About the Man of the Moon and the moon rabbit... Papa, why did the rabbit throw himself on the fire? Wasn’t he afraid he’ll be hurt?”

Ah, the tale for children. Yuuri always wondered why a drastic example like that is good for such young ears. But then again, maybe that’s why it makes the small ones stop and take the tale so seriously.

“Oh, he was surely afraid. Sometimes we are afraid, but when you care about someone deeply and they ask you for help, you are willing to do things which scare you anyway. Just like that time when aunt Mari went to catch the snake, when you were playing in the garden. She knew she could be bitten, but she loves you very much and wanted to protect you. That’s why, she was brave and threw the snake away.”

Victor sits still listening and Yuuri can almost hear him thinking. He’s taking it all in and wants to understand it completely. He tries softly to lead Yuuri through his thought process. “That snake was really angry, but she didn’t look scared at all. She came right away, when I called for her... Wait, so she was scared? I didn’t notice at all!”

He turns back to see Yuuri nodding with a smile on his lips. Victor is amusing in his surprise and earnest in his innocence.

“That story is supposed to teach you that you should to try helping others as best you can, to be compassionate. The rabbit was rewarded for his kindness but it’s not always like that. Sometimes the people you’ll want to please don’t appreciate what you’ll do for them. That’s why it’s important to choose carefully whom you give your help to.”

Victor narrows his eyes, looking at Yuuri intently but turns back to sit properly in seiza. Yuuri continues to comb his hair and notes how naturally Victor straightens in the perfect posture. Minako is right, he’s a natural talent. “You don’t have to worry. No one from the family would ask you to throw yourself into the fire for them. Not even me.”

Victor turns his head to the side and Yuuri can see his silver eyelashes sheltering his blue eyes only for a moment of hesitation. It makes him pause because Yuuri seen this familiar display in past. Years back… Victor meets his eyes and speaks seriously, his young face adding his speech a drastic contrast.

“For you I would, papa.”

Where does this boy get it from? Where from indeed? Not even Toshiya would teach him such lines from his storytelling accompanied by biwa. Yet, it’s impossible for Victor to really understand the seriousness of his proclamation. Yuuri finds himself again at the loss for words. The past meets the present, the young shell of a boy speaks with the fervent proclamation of affection as an adult. And that’s why he just takes Victor in his embrace and wraps his hands around his frail shoulders. He kisses him on the temple and whispers with as much reverence as he can muster.

“I wish that it never happens.” His heart shivers, a flower in the breeze. It feels like it’s festering away like sakura petals turning into mash under people’s feet once they fall down. Yuuri is aching remembering that once his husband jumped into the hot water and almost melted away by doing so. He can still feel the texture of the rash under his fingers, even as he pets Victor’s hair, enjoying the moment of security Yuuri provides for him. He will oofer safety for him as long as he’s alive.

The next morning Minako comes over for a visit and she brings many boxes with herself. They are full of pretty colorful kimonos and Victor is allowed to choose one to try it on. He is so excited he doesn’t stop asking if it’s really okay to touch them. Many of the garments have intricate embroidery and show pictures of animals, birds and even bugs. Victor traces the shapes of flowers on the sleeves, draws lines with forefinger on the waves of the sea and branches of a tree. Yet, when he lifts the lid of the last box he stops and takes out the kimono with both hands, leaving it hanging in front of him. His eyes shine like fireworks on a dark summer night.

“Vic-chan, why that simple one? The one’s with peacocks and willow tree would suit you so nicely!” Minako asks pointing the the box in the no-pile. Yuuri is packing the rejected ones back into the wrapping and secures them safely in the boxes again. When he looks up from the task, his breath gets stuck in his throat.

Victor holds a pure white kimono against his lithe body, stretching one of his arm to the side holding a long sleeve on the display. He’s admiring the fabric, looking down to his feet and shoots his head up to show his joy to Yuuri. His cheeks are flushed and he’s grinning widely. He hops a bit, just like he used to when he was four. A small bunny.

“Can I have this one? Can I? Papa?”

No. Don’t put on the white kimono. When you’ll dance, you’ll lure men, even at this age. The blood of Yuki-onna flows in your veins. You’ll put them in a trance and they will do bad things to you. You’ll be trapped in the hell of ice, the court will eat you alive.

“Yes, of course.” He says instead and Minako shoots him a quizzical look noticing the lack of motivation. She’s frustrated he didn’t support her suggestion and comments on it loudly. But Victor gives her such big puppy-eyes she caves in and helps him to put on the kimono. It’s still a little big on him, so the sleeves drag on the tatami floor behind him as he turns around and walks around to get the feeling of how it’s like to wear it. Minako crosses her hands and braces her chin with one palm, spying on Yuuri. He can feel her gaze burning holes to his skin but continue to sort the boxes until he’s done. She runs out of patience and smacks him on his shoulder. 

“Yuuri!” She barks out almost outraged.

Victor shoots them a questioning glance and thus Yuuri begins. “Vic-chan.” He pauses for effect. “What would you say if Minako and me taught you how to dance in that kimono as well?” The three of them are so quiet for a while, you can hear a pin drop. And then a piercing screech snaps them all to attention. Victor is jumping around and yelling repeatedly - yes, yes. He stops abruptly for a moment and then he runs away from the room, hastily picking up the bottom of the kimono so he can run freely without tripping.

“Mama, Mari!! Toshi-papa!!! Look!!! I will learn to dance!” 

Minako is shocked at first but giggles behind her palm as they hear Victor shouting in the corridor. His eager voice is trailing of with the growing distance. She grabs onto Yuuri and shakes him to mock him a little. It works because he smiles in return to her big cheeky grin and then they laugh together, starting to gather all the boxes. There is a lot of work yet to be done.

***

It takes six years for Victor to learn the basics. It helps that he is withdrawn and is inclined to spend his time with the family or on his own in Yutopia. He doesn’t go out to play with his peers often. Yuuri worries as first and tries to encourage him to interact with them, but after a while he sees it’s bringing more torment to the young Victor than joy. He seems to genuinely indulging in the dancing lessons and also picks up interest in the painting of the fans. He's not skilled in the craft and thus, his fans turn out very wobbly looking. Yuuri is kind and doesn’t let him know. They gift them to the children of the guests.

Minako and Yuuri are dedicating all their free time to Victor. Minako dances alongside Victor demonstrating the choreography and Yuuri teaches him how to move his hands so that the fan twists like a leaf in the wind in his fingers. He’s very dexterous and learns fast. He takes in every new trick and information like a hungry dry sponge, soaking in all he can.

One night in summer when Victor is sixteen, his parents sits on the veranda with Yuuri. Toshiya fans Hiroko’s face and asks her kindly if the speed is just right, wanting to ease her from the heat. Mari took Victor to the Bon Odori pretty much disregarding his arguments. His inclination to stay home with Yuuri didn’t abandon him so he tried to put up a fight.

“Nonsense, you’re a kid. The milk is still trickling down your chin. Every kid needs to dance a Sakura Ondo and eat fatty stuff once in awhile. You can’t stay in the house with the old folk all the time. You never know when it’ll rub off on you. As your aunt I needs some entertainment, can’t you help me out?”

Yuuri loves to watch his parents when they tend to each other. In moments like these it makes him think of the brief time he had with Victor and what could have been for many years to come. It’s a bittersweet ache, but hurts less as the years pass by. Victor, growing up healthy, makes him happy. Just one thing lingers on his mind when he goes to sleep every night. The last regret at his age of thirty five. 

Is Victor happy with him? Does Yuuri make a good father, is Victor really provided with what he needs? Can Yuuri manage it so - that Victor makes it further with his skills - further than Yuuri ever could? Will that ever be enough?

When his father kisses his mother on her fingers, he turns away to give them some privacy. He leaves to the garden and after a short walk he reaches the koi pond. Shishi Odoshi is barely heard, because the loud music from the festival is roaring through the whole town. Flutes, drums and people singing merrily. Sometime later in the evening the fireworks should come. He wonders if they can see it together with Victor. Maybe they can all take a walk and see them from the Hasetsu Castle. It’s a perfect spot to watch over the whole city. 

“Yuuri.” He jumps to attention, when he’s called. Minako is approaching him and the gravel under her zori crunches with each step she takes. Something about her determined look makes the fine hair on his neck stand and he’s more thirsty in the sultry summer than he should be. He’d die for a nice cup of scalding tea.

Minako stops in front of him and takes his shoulders in a firm grasp. Her eyes are pure determination and her lips stretch in a proud smile. Yet he feels he’s shrinking and covering, upon hearing her next words.

“A Lord will come to the onsen tomorrow. He’s a dance appreciator. A friend sent me a message ahead of the caravan. If we time all well, Victor won’t need to go for any auditions. If he catches the eye of this Lord, he will recommend him to the court personally.”

She bumps his chest with her fist gently. The little pressure is nothing, but her gesture combined with the news hits Yuuri like an avalanche, burying him under freezing snow. In the summer heat his back is suddenly suffused by cold sweat. The fireworks start blowing up in the sky and she shouts over them.

“We made it! Victor can prove himself now! He’ll make it to the Emperor’s stage!”

He thinks they won’t make it to the Hasetsu Castle anymore.


	3. There's nothing left to wish for

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was really hard to write. It has no beta. I referenced so many things it's not even healthy.  
> I thank to wonderful people on the Big Bang discord, who motivated me during writing sprints.
> 
> This has no beta. I apologize for any mistakes. 
> 
> WARNING: Please see the tags - they are very spoilerific. The rating changed and some disturbing themes might trigger you. None of the major characters will get hurt.

With a day to prepare for a visit of a lord, the whole Yutopia is on it's feet to get everything done. The message for Minako wasn't just a simple news from a former acquaintance. Turns out her friend holds a higher servant function. They attached an official letter with specific instructions on how many people will stay the night and other details.

With hundred guests coming, the family clears out every room in their establishment - even personal quarters. They will not sleep anyway so it's a sensible choice. Hiroko prepares blankets just in case so Toshiya can go rest to the stables and sleep on the hay if he needs it. He’s not as sturdy anymore and uses a cane to aid his walking. However nothing holds the white haired gentleman from helping in the kitchen with small preparations. 

Every hand is useful, they call the neighbors again. Hefty sum is expected to fill their coin trunk from this one-night visit. Minako takes Victor to her own place to practice last minute and plan out possible choices for the performance. With the chaos in Yutopia there is no room left to dance in so they'll use her studio. 

Victor has starry eyes and begs Yuuri to stay behind to help his parents. “I want to surprise you. Let me prepare alone with Minako.” He holds Yuuri’s hands firmly and his back is straighter than ever. A brave tin soldier.

How can Yuuri deny him anything? And so he’s letting him go after quick lunch. They’ll spend their first night apart. They don't sleep in the same futon for many years, but Yuuri knows he'll feel the empty space beside him gaping with Victor’s absence nonetheless. He spends hours that night laying under the cover, trying to listen to the non-existent breathing of his teenage son.

He stares at the empty spot on the tatami floor and even though Victor’s futon is stored away in the cupboard, he can almost see his silhouette in the twilight. The moon peeks in on Yuuri through the window at midnight and he falls asleep thinking on the shiny silver hair, an evening from years ago - when his husband went to dance for his sake. Yuuri’s body tingles and twitches in his dreams, it's restless - wanting to dance again.

The next day the house is so full they have hard time moving around on the premises.Yuuri’s shoulders are tense and tired. He's glad he doesn't have the bad leg anymore because he’d surely moan in agony from the strain he’s putting it through.

The troop of people resembling a procession is not what they expect. The guests who arrive at the gates of Yutopia don't seem to look forward to the festivities. It's as if the prospect of enjoying an onsen and local delicacies doesn't sound appealing to them at all. The soldiers and servants look strained. A tense advisor approaches Hiroko with special instructions regarding meals and requests access to the kitchen for the personal physician of the lord. He is ill. When the lord arrives and is led to his suite, Yuuri figures out how severe the illness is. When he's given a basket with bloody handkerchiefs, he knows right away - tuberculosis.

Hiroko instructs all staff and family how to handle items the lord will be using, to minimize the danger of infection. They have to wear masks and clean dishes and clothes he'll be using immediately. 

The quiet murmur buzzes in the corridors like wood-worm, eating at everyone present. Their movements are rigid, listless, hands always nervously looking for something to do. Even if they pass a handkerchief or an empty cup around. The Katsukis never had such hard time to offer hospitality. It’s like this is a premonition, waiting for a funeral. 

Yuuri kneads the dough in the kitchen. His fingers dive into the starch and it envelops them with fine translucent layer. The white color is seeping around his vision, swallowing everything and his mind travels in the snow, always on the lookout for the silver hair. White sleeves brush in front of him in a fast spiral, the fabric slides and shrieks quietly. The dull humming drums in his ears. Victor, Victor, Victor.

A bells rings at the gate. Gong echoes in the banquet hall. The lord is calling for dinner and entertainment. Victor arrives, but Yuuri can’t go see him.

Yuuri startles when his mother takes the bowl away carefully. Apology in her eyes. “Yuuri, that’s enough. The dough is kneaded well...” It is. It’s ruined for how much Yuuri squeezed it in his fists.

As planned the schedule unwinds. Courses are passed at the desired intervals, the dishes are served. Minako is playing koto and her girls dance Sakura for the lord's pleasure. Toshiya would go and report excitedly in the kitchen what color of their kimono is tonight. And who is getting drunk the fastest. But tonight no one is making bets and no excited reports reach the kitchen, where Yuuri is stuck.

The gong rings again and it’s time to serve desserts and wine. A call is heard from the backdoor. “Yuuri!” Mari is waving at him like a large Maneki-neko and holds the shoji door open for him. She’d rolling her pipe in her fingers nervously but when he frowns, she prompts him more decisively to go out.

“Father?” When he hears the young voice from the alley behind the house he nearly leaps out like a doe from foxes.

The teenager stand there in the simple kimono, dressed as if in fluffy snow. Striking red obi encircles his waist like dragon’s tongue. His long silver hair is styled in a ponytail, cascading and adorned with peacock kanzashi. The lacquered black geta complete his minimalistic look.

Strikingly beautiful young man, looking at Yuuri with large childlike eyes. A pearl shimmer flickering on his cheekbones, Minako must have used the newest makeup powder from Tokyo. Yuuri wishes he could hug him, once again hold him close to his heart. Wanting to make him hear the beating, clearest language he can you to tell his son that Yuuri loves him above else and will keep him safe. Yet the firm look of his former teacher from the sidelines makes him stop. His palms close tight around empty air and he nods.

“Father. Minako explained everything to me. I know what to do. I will make everyone proud.” Victor all but gushes out, determination blushing his cheeks.

Yuuri swallows and grabs his hands, pressing the same stone to Victor’s palm like he had done years back to his husband. He tries to smile, but knows it's coming of lopsided from pain.

“Snowflake obsidian?” Victor looks from his palm to Yuuri’s face.

“I’ve given it for good luck to a dear friend before a performance when I was young. May it protect you.” He closes Victor’s fingers around it with a strange sense of deja vu, wishing so much to draw him closer and not letting him go., wishing so much to draw him closer and not letting him go.

The gong rings again, it's time for the dance. 

Hiroko hops out from the kitchen, wipes her hands on the apron and takes Victor’s face so that she can press a blessing mother's kiss on his forehead.

Yuuri watches the gravel underneath his zori and hears the faint shuffling of the expensive kimono as Victor walks away. He calls out to hin once more. This time speaking what’s on his mind. He won’t make the same mistake from past. He won’t make the same mistake from the past.

“Victor, you’ll always make me proud. Just be yourself. Don't let others ever take that away from you. No matter who is asking. You don't have to chase after the castle on the moon.”

Victor stands in the door frame with one leg over the threshold, that odd magic from places meeting at the border filling the air with prickling vibrations over the hreshold, that odd magic from spaces meeting at a border, filling the air with prickling sensation and his thoughts are almost visible as they flash across his face. Then deciding on something no one around will ever know, he simply nods and is gone inside the bowels of the house.

Minako squeezes his shoulder as she walks by, whispering reassuringly. “He’ll be fine.” Yet Yuuri doesn’t even find the strength to nod. Koto’s melody rolls into the garden like fingers brushing over the strings and heartache pours into Yuuri’s chest. Shamisen’s harsh plucks assault the fresh evening air and it’s thick with jasmine scent. The retired dancer smells it long after he returns back to the kitchen, helping to make mochi cakes.

If the Katsukis worried about the mood the guests before, now they are unsure if they can handle the load. Because the lord is in small company in the banquet room with dancer girls and Victor, the servants swarm around the premises and get incredibly drunk. Desperately even. Everyone hears about how the lord is harsh and cruel. How it’s pure torture to serve under him. Some soldiers encouraged by liquor whisper loud and clumsy that everyone hopes he will die. That the world would be a better place without him. The caravan is on a senseless trip to Tokyo and the lord drives them as mad cattle without any consideration or common sense. The tuberculosis probably stole his last shreds of sanity.

The Katsukis and Haradas say nothing, but deal with the drunk as best they can. Yuuri is called two times to the banquet room and sees a very excited Victor in the corridor. He’s waiting in between the dances and his face is flushed from the heat. Minako is ready to aid with the fixes and he smiles brightly on Yuuri, when he’s fanning his face and offers him a drink. They don’t need to speak, the silent support is understood and gazes are exchanged in full comprehension.

Victor looks so happy that Yuuri almost forgets his worries and genuinely wishes for his son’s success. He’d seen him dance and enjoy it so. Audience makes the young man happy and if Yuuri could he’d show him to the whole Tokyo. The break is brief and Victor returns back to the banquet room with a confident wink. 

When the shoji door closes, Yuuri’s attention is caught by a dull shimmer on the tatami floor. The obsidian. It must have slipped from Victor’s sleeve and he didn’t notice. Yuuri picks it up and presses it against his lips, frowning deeply. It’s a foolish thought, childish superstition, but he can’t help it. He feels as if this small piece of polished glass won’t be able to offer protection to Victor tonight. He really wishes Victor won’t need it.

As the hour passes the servants leave the banquet room one by one. The musicians follow soon after and then it’s just the lord and Victor inside. When Minako exits, Yuuri’s anxiety climbs the ladder to the roof. She watches him with the knowing gaze. The both know what might happen throughout the next hour. They wait in the corridor in case they’ll be called. Handful of soldiers and servants keeping them company, heavy liquor in their nostrils making them cringe.

Few minutes pass, muted chatter is heard from behind the screen and it sounds like laughter. Good, so it’s probably fine. Laughter is a good sign. Isn’t it? Minako shoots him a weak smile. Clapping comes through the paper and giggles echo in the quiet waiting room. Thuds on the floor makes them understand that Victor is still dancing for the lord, but it’s a lot more free in nature than any official performance ever would be. A month flies through the window and lands on the lantern, its wings flutter and throw around large shadows on the waiters. Yuuri tries to flick it off so it won't get burned on the candle, but it’s desperate and fights his hand no matter what. A soldier chuckles as he drinks from his bottle. By now none of the guest bother with cups.

And just like that the laughter dies, the thudding stops and a cry startles them all. The lord is scolding Victor and they can’t hear him for a moment. Yuuri comes closer to the screen and the soldier behind him laughs like a hyena almost choking on sake. It makes Yuuri’s hands tremble and his thigh stretch like a chord of a biva. Minako opens her mouth to say something but the shout alerts them all to attention.

“N-NO!!!”  
Thunder rattles in Yuuri’s ears and he barges in the room not waiting for any permission. The door is quickly closed behind him as Minako stands in front of it just in case.

He could never prepare himself for what he sees next.

Victor lays on the floor and he is shaking in fright. His beautiful kimono is slipped from him forcefully, his body almost naked and the lord is draped over him with loosened hakama. The man is trembling and spitting out blood. He let’s go of Victor’s recoiled hand and tumbles to his side choking out in spite.

“You...monster...” He sinks beside the young man, wheezes his last wet breath and falls on his back. 

Yuuri walks to them like in a dream and looks on the man on the floor. He’s dead. Frost is covering his naked chest and the blood on his lips is crystallized. His heart was frozen just like his expression.

Yuuri squats down in front of Victor and is about to take his hand, but the other flinches away from his touch with terrifies look. Victor’s hair is longer, his build stronger and he is again aged by a few years. He’s no longer a teenager, but a full grown young man. Frightened to death and who committed a murder. A tear trickled down Victor’s cheek and Yuuri wants to wipe it away and cradle him in his arms, but the moment he stirs Victor jumps to his feet spatting out.

“Don’t touch me!” 

The older man swallows hard in pain and watches as Victor looks on his own shaking hands. He can see he’s still in disbelief about what happened and what he’d done. Their eyes meet and more tears rolls down Victor’s cheek when he whispers all broken.

“Don’t touch me...I… I have to leave.” He retreats from Yuuri and escapes through the backdoor into the garden.

Yuuri has no time to react, afraid to scare him even more, he let’s Victor go and doesn’t follow him. He sees him run into the shed, understanding he’s going to hide for a while but not leaving forever as he originally thought in terror. Not knowing how to deal with the situation at the moment he does the only thing he thinks as sensible. 

He wipes the lord's dead body and covers him to give the scene some decency. Then he calls for the physician. The soldier closest to the door shouts in giddy delirium that the lord is dead and that they have to celebrate. The whole convoy cheers and the physician doesn’t really hurry to see his master’s body. He simply nods, when Yuuri tells him he saw him collapse clutching his chest. 

“A heart attack. A kind dead considering he’d choke on his own lungs otherwise. A real blessing.”

No one questions what happened and Yutopia runs out on liquor. The mourning is a big loud festival and no one even thinks about being sad. Hefty sum is paid for the one night’s stay as they leave. A secrecy is sworn among all - what happens at Yutopia that night, stays at Yutopia.

If there was an invitation to the court to join the emperor’s dance troupe, Victor never responds to it - he doesn’t leave with the convoy, but he avoids Yuuri. It seems he can’t look him in the eye without recoiling and turning away in regret. Again no one questions his fast aging up and Yuuri is not surprised at all. Somehow he’s gotten used to it, if it’s even possible.

He doesn’t press on Victor and let’s him take a moment with himself to sort through what happened. He wants to help. His son was almost raped and killed a man. He surely doesn’t understand his strange manifested powers and it must be confusing for him. But if he doesn’t trust him, he’d only chase him away. And so Yuuri chooses to wait and let Victor come to him.

They sleep in separate rooms now, Victor takes his pillow and futon quietly and bids him good night. Bare politeness is the only dialogue they share since the accident. At night he hear Victor through the walls crying in his sleep, tormented by nightmares. He feels horrible and inadequate. Utterly useless as a parent and it eats him alive bit by bit. 

A week later Yuuri catches Victor spying at him oddly as if he was searching for something on his face. As if he’d seen Yuuri for the first time. Yuuri let’s him. Bit by bit he notices that Victor is less reluctant and although he avoids being touched by other people, he doesn’t hide away as much anymore. 

At dinner when Hiroko offers him a piece of sweet cake wanting to comforting him, Yuuri understand. Victor hesitates and carefully takes the offering barely touching her fingers with his lips. He was afraid he’d hurt them as well. Hiroko smiles wide and continues to feed him the whole evening despite him being twenty years old. Somehow Victor’s timid behavior makes him look like a child in need of protection.

Yuuri’s hands itch, but he clenches them in his lap and finished his bowl in quiet conversation with Mari and his father. They discus mundane things like how many mackerel to prepare for tomorrow's breakfast and muse that it’s soon time to harvest persimmon. All the time feeling the careful side glances of his son on himself. Yuuri really hopes the time to talk comes soon.

He doesn’t have to wait long.

That night he sits on the porch gazing at the stars and the moon high on the sky. The koi fish shoal near the surface eager to be fed. The squelching travels in the breeze and almost deafen Yuuri with the volume. With everything sleeping at peace the sound is thunderous. It helps to keep the noise in his mind away. One moment he looks at the water shimmering and the twisting fishes breaking it and the other he looks to his side and sees Victor peeking from behind a pillar, wearing a jinbei. He’s leaning his forehead on it, just half of the face visible. Hair is hiding what’s left of his face in the shadow. Yuuri’s toes curl and back stiffens. He reminds himself to breath again and swallows carefully preparing his voice to sound calm. This is a big progress. Victor came to him.

“Can’t sleep?”

The young man twists his head slightly and Yuuri wouldn’t notice the tiny movement if he wasn’t paying close attention.

“Me neither.” He smiles encouragingly and relaxes his stiff pose. Victor takes a step closer but still hides in the shadow of the roof. Yuuri offers him a straw which Victor desperately seems to clutch for.

“Bad dreams? Want to talk about them?”

Yuuri wonders if he really can offer to be the ground to stand upon. A crippled man, halfway to forty, with silver sprinkling his temples. Victor became his son as a baby and Yuuri was his parent for fourteen years. This young man standing in front of him looks and acts like an adult. Yuuri is completely lost. 

He doesn't fathom in the slightest if Victor remembers anything from his past life at all. He doesn't know if Victor understands what he truly is. Yuuri himself is not sure. 

How does Yuuri approach the subject of the horrible transgression of the lord - the attempted rape? And how to console someone who killed a man, even in self-defense? How to explain what happened?

What is Victor? A human? A Yuki-onna trapped in magic woven human shell? How does one even begin such a complex conversation? 

Victor sits beside him. The moonlight sliding over his face makes the shadows etch his features. They look a lot haggard and Yuuri notes with a pang how deep are the circles under Victor’s eyes. He looks exhausted, ready to give up. Yuuri wishes that he'd never let Victor go into the banquet room, never taught him to dance and instead should have hidden him in a cave, in safety, away from all the people. But Yuuri knows that you can't find peace by avoiding life. They are here now and that still means something. 

“I dream of bad people. They laugh and follow me with cruel eyes. I run to the forest and dance. On and on. In the snow - barefoot. But… it doesn't feel cold? At all! I'm just…” 

The turmoil is so obvious on Victor’s features, he wants to continue but isn't sure if he can. He searches Yuuri for support and the other nods. He smiles weakly and goes on, trying to describe his nightmares.

“There was a man. In a house… I think. I danced for him. Or with him?... I made me really relieved. Then I woke up all bloody and my hands were glowing. But I was still asleep. Now that I'm awake, I mean...haha, it's kind of funny. I don't know if - if it's real? If I'm… real?”

The carps roll over in a tangle, greedy for the chance of a meal. The sound is almost lascivious and crude in contrast to Victor’s sweet sounding desperation. He's hiding his face in his palms and it seems like his shoulders carry a big burden. Larger than he can handle. Yuuri reaches out to pet his back, to let him know he is there for him. Fingers hovering over his shoulder blades, ready to rest on them.

“Ano… sumimasen…”

They both startle at the child's voice. It's a daughter of a guest. She lost her way from the bathroom. Yuuri beckons them both to come with him. He leads the girl to her room and without much preamble invites Victor to their sleeping room. He rolls out a second futon, drags it right beside his and encourages Victor to lay down. Victor follows obediently like a lost sheep in the need of guidance, still insecure and demure.

As they lay looking at each other Yuuri waits until Victor’s breath is calmer and the other breaths out a little less anxious.

“You can sleep now. I am here watching over you. And when you wake up I’ll still be here. I will tell you if it's real, ok?”

Victor stares at him for a while, holding his breath and then his shoulders relax and he agrees with a simple nod. After that his eyelids sink down as if pulled by gravity, the tiredness winning the battle over insomnia and tormenting nightmares. It’s like Yuuri blew sleeping sand into his eyes and cast a spell on him. Perhaps it’s the lingering ability of parents who charm their child of any age to rest and clothe it in a blanket of peace by the sheer tone of voice.

Yuuri hopes Victor will have only good dreams this night. He watches him closely till the late hours and falls asleep when the sun is starting to rise from behind the horizon. Only then he allows himself to rest.

This time it’s Yuuri who is not sure if he’s still dreaming or not. He feels like he's in his lover’s embrace. 

Warmth spreads on his back, limbs are twisted with his own. Cotton, settled in his mind, making it not care about deciphering what's happening. His consciousness flirts entirely with the slender leg slipping between his thighs, with the hand sliding over his waist towards his groin and with the moist lips gliding blindly over his neck. The fingers slip skillfully on his tender skin, making him hard under the light but sure touches. The silkworm weaving a sweet cocoon over his chest, spinning a mantle he doesn't want to untangle from. A delighted deep sigh reaches his ears and it sounds remotely like his own voice. 

Something firm presses against his behind in no rush and rocks with him lazily. He wants to lean back, sink and dissolve into the embrace yet the words whispered against his nape snap his eyes open like the loudest thunder. 

“Yuuri…”

He looks down to see a hand wrapped around his member and with a shock he takes in the long silver strands brushing over his skin. Dread washes his whole body with flood of goosebumps. 

Victor is glued to him like a tight fitting spoon and half asleep nuzzles against him. Yuuri doesn't think, he bolts from the gentle but surprisingly strong grapple and tangles in the sheets in the process. The start wakes Victor and he barely braces himself in time so that he doesn't fall face down on the futon. 

When he sees Yuuri recoil and covering himself in modesty, it hits Victor clear as a swift spear. They both pale, realizing the boundary between a child and a father was trespassed. Victor scrambles away fast. He sputters awkwardly that he has to go and despite his efforts to preserve some dignity, Yuuri notices the tent in his jinbei.

Yuuri manages to choke out a haggard “yes" and then Victor is gone. When he's done counting all the squares on the paper door, he puts on the wooden leg and goes into the kitchen to inquire carefully about Victor’s whereabouts. His sister is just done with the dishes and looks up from preparing her inseparable pipe. She was heading out for a smoke.

“He left in a hurry all flushed and with no change of clothes. He said he’ll be at Minako’s and doesn't know when he’ll return… You look really weird. Did you two fight?”

Mari follows him until they reach the men’s baths, he avoids her questions and then leaves her hanging with a confused look on her face. He doesn’t have any answers anyway. Once more he is torn and barely catching his breath trying to get used to the changes. It doesn’t help that he knows he should be a supportive father figure to his son, who needs his back now more than ever. 

Yuuri empties a bucket on his head and makes sure it’s the cold one. His body feels dirty and he is driven to wash the arousal away. He’d never feel physical attraction to his son, even if he looks very close to his former husband. Yet, it did happen. He was touched, even if unconsciously, and reacted to the fondling. It felt just like when his husband did it, the way the fingers curled, knew where to trace the fingertips, where to place the lips on the tender spot over the vein on his neck. And lord, have mercy on him, the way he was called by his given name. His son never called him like that. Papa or father, that’s what he always was to Victor.

So Yuuri knows this is all wrong and he doesn’t want anything else than to be a parent to his son. Yet the slip into the painfully familiar memory shifted his perception of him, even if momentarily. And once again he can’t say anything to anyone. Not even to Minako in a drunken stupor, because this would certainly raise reaction he wouldn’t know how to face. Perhaps not wanting to face it is the only way he can avoid giving into his confusion. Since Victor - his love - disappeared, Yuuri lost such integral part of his soul that he never recovered from the loss. So if it means to hold onto a thread, even if a thin one, he’ll claw to it. Victor needs him and he want to be there for him.

He finished his bath when his lips are completely blue and spends the whole evening consumed by going over the future conversation with Victor. He’ll do it properly and won’t let anything disturb them. Yes, he’ll set it all right. He’ll lock the memories away and be the father Victor deserved. He’ll ask him what he can do for him now. There are other ways to let him dance and be successful. If he’ll want it Yuuri will support him. He’ll even start painting the fans again so they can buy more expensive kimono’s for Victor’s performances. What does it matter if it’s the small Hasetsu. Doesn’t matter where the stage is, but who is on it. He’ll do anything to make Victor, his son, happy.

The dinner is prepared, the guests served and Yuuri paces the main room. He wants to go to Victor, the determination growing. Then he realizes that maybe it’s better to wait for the eagerness to die down a little so he won’t come on too strong. He has to consider too that Victor needs time as well. In the end he settles with that and prepares for sleep. The next morning he’ll go the first thing in the morning to Minako and fetch Victor. He’ll take him to a fine tearoom for an indulgent breakfast and then they can plan which establishments could let Victor perform. It will all depend on what Victor will want of course. 

When sits on the futon, unbuckling the belts on his leg, a soft rapping disturbs him. The doors slide and reveal Mari peeking inside with a quizzical look. When she stares like that, he knows she is trying to get the best out of prolonging his confusion. She loves teasing people, just like she loves gambling on kabuto fights. Then she arches her eyebrows, just like a nonchalant cat would lick her paw and clicks her tongue. 

“He’s back. He’s sleeping in a spare room at ryokan. He looks better, by the way. Figured you’d like to know. I don’t know what happened, but work it out between each other, ok? I don’t want to see your moping around here. Sleep well. 'Night.”

A small smile creeps on his lips, little flicker of hope is ignited in his heart. So Victor found his way back. Sure he is in the west wing and not in their private quarters, but he returned. There is a room to talk. They’ll meet each other halfway. At least Yuuri hopes Victor will let him. Yuuri can’t wait for the morning and tries hard to quiet down the anticipation. He falls asleep almost immediately.

Smoke hitting his nostrils wakes him up and the dreams of smoked fish are dissolved immediately. Fire. There is not time to put on his leg, so he crawls quickly to his spare crutch and is hobbling out of the room through the corridors and sees servants running out. Where is his family? They are outside, hurry. 

When they reach the courtyard, he steps out as the last one. He sees his parents and Mari right away in the group of people at the mouth of the onsen in safety, clutching to each other and his mother’s eyes shine with relief when she spots him. Familiar faces of neighbors and other Hasetsu residents run around shouting. Yuuri becomes rigid and asks with bad taste on his tongue. Familiar terror hooks its claws under his shoulder blades.

“Where is Victor?”

Mari is like struck, confusion written all over her face. “He went to look for you in the ryokan? Someone said they saw you there?”

Yuuri turns and sees the scenery. It’s like a huge bonfire, the roof of the ryokan is ablaze. The onsen is separated from the newer building but everyone in the town is rushing to stop the fire. If it spreads it’ll burn down half of the city. Men, women, all are helping. They isolated fire around the ryokan, but the fire intensity is strong. It’s clear it will go down in ashes. With Victor inside.

Yuuri feels the hands grab at him faintly, but he frees himself from them with impressive dexterity and goes straight to the burning entrance like to the cave of a dragon. Nothing stops him, no crutch, no people, nothing. He grabs a bucket from someone’s hands and pours it over himself.

Once inside he searches the rooms frantically, avoiding the burning walls and walks on the safe patched of the floor. Some rooms are full of yellow and red color and he can’t see anything inside them. He hopes it isn’t the one where Victor went to look for him. It gets hotter the deeper he gets inside, the fire licks everything in sight, he hears the crackling of the wood above him, the roof is going to collapse soon. Where is Victor, where is he?

Yuuri is beside himself, desperation fueling him with adrenaline. Another corridor, more glowing ashes fall from the ceiling like hellish fireflies and float in the writhing air. It burns his skin, it’s like he’s inside an oven. It’s painful to breath the longer he stays in the belly of the house. He reaches the main hall and still no sight of Victor. He calls for him all along the way and as he’s about to turn to the adjacent hall the large beam falls right behind his back, missing him barely by an inch.

“Yuuri!!!”

He flinches and searched for the voice coming from the smoke. It parts and reveals Victor on the other side, cut of from Yuuri, but free to reach the exit. And just like that Yuuri relaxes and smiles. It feels almost pleasant, the heat around him, the squeaking house singing a sacrifice song to the fire. He sees Victor is also wet, black smudges over his face and he coughs, looking madly for a way to reach Yuuri. It’s useless. 

Yuuri remembers the wish he once told about to Victor.

_“You don’t have to worry. No one from the family would ask you to throw yourself into the fire for them. Not even me.”_

_“For you I would, papa.”_

_“I wish that it never happens.”_

Somehow Victor sees his calm face and freezes in disbelief when Yuuri shouts over the noise.

“Victor, go!”

“No!”

“Run! Save yourself!”

“NO! I won’t leave you!!!” Victor is stretched like a bow string, posture tight to the point of snapping. A matching fire burns in his eyes, refusal to accept defeat. This is not a small child throwing a tantrum. Yet Yuuri can’t allow it - won’t allow it.

“VICTOR!!!”

“YUURI, NO!!!”

The older man gasps but part of the roof collapses behind Victor, now completely sealing him away from escape. They stand quiet look each other up and down. Their eyes meet and Yuuri recognizes the gaze looks a lot older than his son’s body is. His throat clenches and he swallows afraid again. Victor smiles bitterly and speaks loud enough to be heard.

“Yuuri, I know.”

Yuuri chokes out almost a pained sob, not wanting to believe it - fighting the rising hope and it’s fulfillment in the worst timing and place.

“What do you...” He doesn’t manage to finish and a teardrop falls down from his chin.

“I remember everything. I won’t leave, Yuuri. I just won’t!” He shakes his head and doesn’t give Yuuri any chance to take in the information. 

Victor steps forward to Yuuri, the other jumps to warn him because he’s getting to close to the burning wood. But the room shines all turquoise and all kinds of other blues, shimmers like in the bottom of the sea. Fire freezes into ice stalagmites. Ash falls like snowflakes. It’s cool, it’s easy to breath and then Yuuri sees just white, feeling like he’s losing consciousness. 

Strong arms envelop him and he falls, lips on his forehead and the worry is gone. It’s just peace. 

He comes to a moment later, perceives his heavy body is being carried from the still burning house. He barely manages to lift his eyelids which feel like they are made from lead. His sees a familiar yet a new sight.

Victor is smiling at him from underneath a short fringe, wrinkles around his eyes forming crows feet. It’s him, his husband, but much older then he remembers him. Almost as if… he never left and aged among Yuuri. He can’t believe it, the heavy relief pours over his chest, it hurt. So, so bad. If it’s a dream, he never wants to wake up. Instead he falls back, sinking into the merciful obliviousness.

He wakes up a lot later in his own room in the onsen. The first thing he sees is Victor laying beside him holding his hand and kissing his knuckles. He speaks and a warm breath fans over them as he does.

“Hello. Do you feel better?”

Time stops for them, Yuuri’s eyes fill with tears. The same question he was asked years ago, when Victor first came to their home. Yuuri wishes all the years were just a strange hallucination and he’s still afraid to believe it. He has to ask.

“Victor… are you real?”

The man brushes Yuuri’s tears away in a futile attempt. It doesn’t help at all because they just keep coming and coming. His smile is weak and broken. 

“As real as you want me to be.”

They cradle each other's faces and their foreheads touch. Yuuri sobbing grossly and Victor having trouble not to break out in tears as well. He doesn’t last long because Yuuri’s wailing tips him over the edge. He has his whole face showered with despairing pecks. He is weeping too.

“You are real, you are here. You are here.” Yuuri repeats the prayer. 

“Yes, yes, I am here. I love you so so much.” Victor answers and goes up on his knees, throws the cover away from them and slides his hands down Yuuri’s leg till the end of the thigh where it end in a stump. Hi traces it with trembling fingers and worships the tender scarred skin with the gentlest kisses, dampening it with teardrops. “I’m so sorry, I’m so very sorry. I couldn’t heal your leg in time. You won’t ever dance again.”

Yuuri is lost because Victor sinks onto his lap and hold onto him for dear life, crying his heart of. Beating himself up for something that wasn’t his fault. It makes him want to be strong for Victor once again and he leans over him like a tower over a moat, hiding him in his shade from all the hurt and pain.

“You saved my life. What does a leg matter. I will dance with you, you’ll help me, won’t you? Will you... stay?” He holds onto Victor’s back, roaming it with palms, trying to map out as much of it as possible. The fright that he’ll disappear is too strong. Victor tenses under his arms and rises to his level, taking his hands and kissing their back.

“Yuuri, I will never have to leave. This is it. All the power, it’s gone… I’ll never be able to...bring you as much pleasure again. I’m a...human now.” 

He says it with such reverence, hesitation and regret at the same time. They stare at each other for a moment and Victor starts to get really nervous, thinking about his aged body and being so very useless as an ordinary human. Maybe he won’t make Yuuri happy anymore - not as he could before.

Yuuri bursts out laughing and rests his forehead on Victor’s shoulder for support, trying to calm down. Perhaps it’s the stress of all those years leaving his system, being replaced by love and joy. Like there is no other way. Once he catches his breath, he caresses Victor’s nape, enjoying how his nails brush against the fine short hair. He sinks them into the shapely cut locks reveling the confused look he’s getting back.

“Out of all the things you’re worrying about my orgasm?” For a second Victor looks again like a child and Yuuri considers if he didn’t ruin it all with such a remark. But then Victor breaks out in choked laughter as well and they fall in each other’s arms on the futon.

“I missed you so much.” Yuuri whispers against his ear. 

“I was here all the time. I never really left.” Victor says in return and murmurs into Yuuri’s mouth. “Thank you for loving me for all those years.” 

Once they seal their lips in a kiss it quickly turns into searing discourse. It’s heated, rushed and clumsy. The need is too strong, the years of denying each other as lovers, both push against their patience. But they do break from the kiss gasping for air. It feels the same and different at the same time. They need to relearn their bodies. As if Victor sensed his insecurity, he encourages Yuuri, scattering his palms over his back and landing them on his buttocks.

“You are so beautiful.” 

Yuuri’s face flushes delicately but he presses against Victor without reserve. 

“Make me feel even more beautiful.” It feels like Victor is eating his body with his hungry gaze. As if he’d never be sated by the sight. “Take me.”

From that moment they go slow. Earnest, heartfelt and deep. Indulgent kisses, tasting their flavor from each other’s tongues. Their chests melt, they adore each other, appreciating the closeness. It feels like they don’t have enough arms to embrace, not enough fingers to touch, yet the love supplements the lack of everything. They wallow in it with abandon. Victor plunges into the pliant soaking Yuuri and the other gasps from the onslaught. 

It’s slow, but hard. Runs deep into their bones, just as their feelings. Victor writhes on top of him, using all of his muscles to support the flowing thrusts. He uses his weight to penetrate deeper and take some of it off, bracketing Yuuri’s head with balled fists. He watches Yuuri with heavy eyelids, breathing quiet but labored. Yuuri holds onto his own leg with one hand and with the other he’s leading Victor’s hips towards him.

“Please, please.” He wants so badly and begs. It hurts to feel empty for such a long time. He wants to be filled immediately, completely and leak over. And then he wants Victor to catch him as he spills in his arms.

“Not yet, not enough.” Victor twists Yuuri on his side and slides behind him as a big spoon. He grabs Yuuri’s leg once more and hooks it over his elbow. His fingers find Yuuri’s flesh and they spread the dribbling honey down his sensitive skin. It makes the hold sliding easily and smooth. Very soon Yuuri quivers in his hold, crying out in desperation.

“So good! Please, Victor, more!”

Victor pressed Yuuri’s leg into the futon and turns him face down on the pillow. He bends over him heavy. Yuuri cants his hips so he can catch Victor sliding into him from the best angle. Their moves get raw, chasing after the satisfaction. They are both heated too much to take more time with gentle attention. There will be plenty of time later for that.

Victor’s fingers lock in a tight grip around Yuuri’s member and stroke him with quick efficient jerks. Yuuri feels teeth nibbling on his shoulder and the murmurs are falling over his earlobe as Victor’s hips slam against his buttocks.

“Yes, my love, yes! I’ll give it to you all and more.” 

It sends a shiver down his spine, lodges in his belly and coils icy lava in his core. He is molten and frozen at the same time. In a moment that lasts forever. He couldn’t wish for a more perfect one. Yet Victor manages to give more than a bloody kiss on his neck in past ever could. He slips out of Yuuri and replaces himself with fingers, working in tandem. They hook with certainty, find his spot and all he needs are few harsher strokes and kiss on his temple.

It hits him like an earthquake. He completely loses ground and doesn't even perceive as Victor sinks back inside him and rides himself out. A while later he comes back to his senses gradually and finds himself in Victor’s gentle arms, clean and warm. 

Yuuri is drifting away, but Victor’s soft nudge holds him off. He focuses with great effort to give him his attention.

“Yuuri, there might be something you need to know.” His voice is hesitant but firm. “The power I used, it was enough for protecting us from the fire and make people forget what they saw. But… they don’t remember me or us being married.”

Yuuri braces him on his elbow and looks on the door thinking quickly. Victor is stroking idly the back of his hand with a fingertip as he waits for Yuuri’s reaction. He turns to Victor with an relaxed expression.

“Well then, I better go tell my parents to prepare a wedding kimono for both or us.”

Victor’s eyes are huge as plates, blush blooms on his cheeks like delicate pink roses, but his eyes shine. 

“Yuuri..! I’m a total stranger in your household.” He protests weakly.

“Victor. As I see it now, you appeared out of nowhere, saved me from a burning house and then spend the night with me in my private room, making everyone hear what we were doing here the whole time. I think my family would like it if we...you know...gotten together officially. You look like a good catch too.” 

Victor chokes on nothing and spits out. “Now do it, really...”

It is exactly as Yuuri said. When they finally emerge from their sleep, the family hosts a huge feast. They invited all people who helped during the fire. The lost the whole ryokan, but the old Yutopia house stayed intact due to some sheer luck. The parents gush around the newly formed couple and Victor can once again enjoy the excited attention of Yuuri’s family. It can’t feel any better.

Because the Katsukis saved up quite a bit on the side and didn’t spend much during their prosperous years, they arrange a wedding in a month’s time. When they exchange the vows again, Victor knows it wasn’t right.

It feels even better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much!
> 
> ps: I have an idea for another short sequel, but not victuuri.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> This is taking lyrics from Natsu no Hana by JuJu. (Mononoke tv series ending)  
> There is a [playlist](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLTLVtgvLm08l0zpyugfx4t-Sa60S3ur8-) I made for this Yuki-onna series if you'd be interested.
> 
> Eof made a very cute gif-set of Victor as Yuki-onna. You can see it [here](https://eof-doodles.tumblr.com/post/164066145925/because-we-all-need-a-smiling-yuki-onna-after-that). Thank you so much!!!


End file.
